Remember when your parents told you to keep money talk private and never let anyone know if you’re struggling?

How will we all feel less alone in our struggles if no one is willing to talk about them?

Take that, Mom.

(Just kidding, my mother is lovely.)

But you probably have a person in your life who wishes you would shush on the imperfections.

Which is a shame, no pun intended, because these stories are a gift.

Rachel Kramer Bussel reached out to me after I published a reported essay on ADHD and money in The New York Times because, inspired by that piece, she wanted to publish her own about bankruptcy. Recently, that story came out in the same section, edited by the same editor.

Though it wasn’t her first time talking about the bankruptcy, this was the biggest stage on which she told her story as a reported essay.

As I did with the ADHD story, Rachel started with her personal experience, then bloomed out into telling the story of others.

Here’s how the experience affected her:

“I had and sometimes still have shame about my debt because mine wasn’t for a noble reason like caregiving or for something beyond my control like medical bills. It felt privileged and wrong to complain about owing money I knowingly spent.

But the idea for this article stayed with me, and when I saw that Mike Dang was looking for articles on money and finance, I knew I wanted to pitch him and hopefully keep other people from making the mistake of waiting so long to file if they’re a good candidate. Paulette’s article on women and ADHD was helpful to me personally as someone with ADHD and was a model I used to structure mine (and mentioned in my pitch).

For me, there’s something freeing about putting my shameful experiences out of my head and into the world. I’ve already beaten myself up about it a lot, and if I can use my mistakes to help people who might find themselves in the same situation while advancing my writing career, I’m happy to. I wouldn’t feel comfortable giving financial advice because I just have my own experience to go on, so this was a perfect opportunity to share my story and talk to experts.”

This is what I live for in personal essay writing.

It’s about taking those things your mother told you never to discuss at dinner parties and turning them into an opportunity for connection. Into understanding. Into a giant permission slip for others to be human, too.

Let me help you start the process. When you sign up for The Finishing School for Writers, we’ll work together to :

• Turn your “Oh god, I can never tell anyone about this” moments into compelling narratives to free yourself from the shame
• Structure your essays for maximum impact
• Find the universal thread in your personal chaos

Ready to scandalize your family and help others feel less alone?

May you free yourself with your story,

Paulette

P.S. Rachel is the personal essay editor of Open Secrets and accepting pitches! You have until December 31 to submit, so we have time to prepare your submission if you sign up now!